A Testimony by H.G. Shriman Matsya Avatar Prabhu

Dear devotees, friends, and guests,

First of all, I would like to offer my respectful obeisances to all the Vaishnavas present and warmly thank the organizers of this Reunion for their gracious invitation.

On an occasion such as this, in which we celebrate sixty years of ISKCON, it would be natural to speak about works accomplished, projects undertaken, journeys made, temples, institutions, and services rendered over the years.

Yet, reflecting deeply on what I wish to share with you, I feel that the heart of my testimony is not what I have done.

The heart is what I have received.
It is my meeting with Srila Prabhupada.
Everything else came afterward.

Everything else, insofar as it may have had any value, has simply been an attempt to respond to that grace.

A few years before meeting Srila Prabhupada, I was a young man engaged in the search for truth. I had explored different paths, met significant people, and immersed myself in many books and teachings, yet I felt that something essential was still missing: a synthesis capable of giving unity, direction, and fulfillment to that search.

It was then that I met a yogi on the banks of the Ganges. After a friendship developed between us, and after listening to my questions and reflections, he spoke words that I have never forgotten: “You must go to Vrindavana. You must meet an authentic lover of God. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada will introduce you to Krishna.”

Until that moment, I had never heard of either Vrindavana or Srila Prabhupada. Yet those words penetrated deeply into my consciousness.

A few days later, I departed for Vrindavana.

I still remember the emotion of those two days there: the spiritual atmosphere, the holy places, the devotees, and the feeling of having entered a dimension that, although still unknown to me, seemed strangely familiar.

But above all, I remember the moment when I was received by Srila Prabhupada in Delhi on August 30, 1976.

Many people meet learned men. Some meet great personalities. Others meet spiritual guides.

I had the good fortune to meet a person who lived completely immersed in love for Krishna.

It was not so much what he said that struck me.

It was what he was.

His presence. His authenticity. His total dedication. His complete absence of personal interest.

For the first time, I saw a person whose life appeared to be entirely centered on service to God.

I understood that spirituality was not merely a philosophy. It was not merely a discipline. It was not merely a search.

It was a relationship of love.

A love lived, embodied, and offered.

I was blessed to receive a personal darshana from Srila Prabhupada. That conversation left an imprint on my life that continues to accompany me to this day.

I remember that, after observing me for a few moments, he asked whether we had already met.

I replied: “No. We have never met. But during the last few days I have thought about you intensely. I have even dreamed about you.”

Then he asked: “Do you believe in God?”

I remained silent for a moment and then nodded.

Srila Prabhupada then spoke about the dramatic crisis in which the world is living, about the value of human life, the rarity of this opportunity, and the necessity of developing love for God, for Krishna. He helped me understand that human life should not be wasted, because it is meant for spiritual realization.

I listened in silence.

At a certain point he asked: “Then what is the problem?”

I replied honestly: “If I stay here with you and the devotees, there is no problem at all. But I must return to Italy. I have founded several companies, I have business partners, responsibilities, and a young woman waiting for me. Do you think all this could create obstacles to following the path you are indicating?”

Srila Prabhupada did not invite me to abandon what I had built.

He told me to become a devotee, to chant Hare Krishna, to study Bhagavad-gita, and to place my trust in Krishna’s protection.

Then he added words that I have never forgotten: “You have talents. Do you know where they come from?”

I remained silent.

He continued: “Every talent belongs to God. Put them in Krishna’s service.”

Finally, looking deeply into my eyes, he repeated several times: “Krishna will protect you. Krishna will protect you. Krishna will protect you. Don’t fear.”

Nearly fifty years later, those teachings continue to accompany my life and service.

Srila Prabhupada’s words did not remain for me merely a conversation to be remembered.

Looking back upon those days, even circumstances that appeared accidental now seem like pieces of a single design.

I had donated to the temple everything that remained to me. In order to meet Srila Prabhupada, I missed my return flight and had to wait two days before two seats became available for me and my traveling companion, who was not feeling well.

During that unexpected pause, I began studying Bhagavad-gita intensely and speaking about its teachings with the people I met.

During the train journey from Rome to Livorno, after checking the tickets, the conductor stopped to listen. We continued speaking about Bhagavad-gita throughout the journey, to the point that, once we arrived, he personally informed me that we had reached Livorno station and helped me unload my luggage.

My friends and acquaintances knew that for a long time I had been searching for a higher purpose for my life. For this reason, after returning home, on September 20, 1976, I invited approximately seventy people to dinner and gave the gathering a title: “A Reflection on the Meaning of My Journey to India.”

During my first visit to the Rome Temple, I had purchased a full box of the first Italian edition of Bhagavad-gita As It Is, and I gifted a copy to each of them.

From that time onward, Srila Prabhupada has always remained present in my life. Not merely as a memory, but as a reference within my heart.

For this reason, on the first page of all my books, immediately after the cover, I have chosen to include these words: “With affection and gratitude to my eternal benefactor and Master, A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada, upon whose teachings I have founded my life.”

I did not yet know where all this would lead me.

I only knew that I had taken very seriously Srila Prabhupada’s invitation to study Bhagavad-gita and share its teachings with the people I would meet throughout my life.

As the years and decades passed, those apparently scattered pieces began to reveal not only the quantity of events experienced, but also the inner quality of the journey: the rasa of the grace received and the service offered.

Looking back today upon that darshana, it becomes increasingly clear to me that Srila Prabhupada did not simply ask me to change my life externally.
He taught me to consecrate it.

He did not ask me to renounce the talents I had received.
He taught me to recognize their divine origin.
He did not ask me to flee from responsibilities.
He showed me how to transform them into service.
He did not ask me to abandon what I had built.
He showed me how to offer it to Krishna.

Since then, my life has been an attempt, certainly imperfect, to understand and apply these teachings.

The external forms of service have changed many times over these decades. Yet the inspiration that generated them has remained substantially the same.

During the 1970s and 1980s, my service was carried out primarily in the temples.

During the 1990s, I had the privilege of contributing, together with other devotees, to the construction of altars, temples in different countries, and the Pushpa Samadhi Mandir of Srila Prabhupada in Mayapur.

Later, I had the privilege of contributing to the development of the temple hall at Chowpatty, Mumbai.

Today I find myself engaged in the reflection and development of the Srila Prabhupada Birth Place Memorial in Kolkata.

Looking at these experiences from the outside, someone might see different activities.
I see, above all, continuity.

The instruments change.
The intention remains the same.
Ultimately, it is always a matter of building.

Sometimes temples are built.
Sometimes altars are built.
Sometimes places of pilgrimage are built.
Sometimes educational institutions are built.
Sometimes training programs are developed.
Sometimes relationships are built.
Sometimes cultural bridges are built.

But the principle remains the same: to place whatever Krishna entrusts to us in the service of Srila Prabhupada’s mission.

It was from this perspective that the Centro Studi Bhaktivedanta was founded in 1995.
Not as an end.
But as a means.
Not as an accomplishment to be celebrated.
But as an instrument of service.

During the final years of his earthly presence, Srila Prabhupada emphasized the importance of Varnashrama-dharma. He also founded the Bhaktivedanta Institute so that scholars, scientists, and men and women of culture could engage in dialogue with the Bhaktivedanta tradition and Krishna Consciousness.

The Centro Studi Bhaktivedanta has sought, with all the limitations and imperfections that accompany every human undertaking, to offer a contribution in that direction.

Many devotees render magnificent service through temple management, congregational preaching, Deity worship, the distribution of Srila Prabhupada’s books, and many other activities.

The CSB has simply sought to serve in other contexts universities, schools, hospitals, courts of law, cultural institutions, professional environments, and dialogue with the academic and religious worlds.

I have never perceived these fields as separate from Srila Prabhupada’s mission.

I have regarded them as places where his vision could be presented through language appropriate to those being addressed.

Over the years I have encountered different sensibilities, different approaches, and different ways of understanding service.
I have learned to sincerely respect these differences.
Personally, I have always tried to understand what, in the concrete circumstances before me, would be the most faithful way of serving Srila Prabhupada.

What matters most to me is fidelity to the principles received and their application within the changing conditions of time, place, and circumstance.

Bhagavad-gita teaches that each person should serve according to his or her own sva-dharma.

According to one’s own nature.
According to the capacities received.
According to the circumstances in which Krishna has placed us.
Not everyone serves in the same way.
Not everyone builds the same things.
Not everyone walks the same paths.

But everyone can offer what they are.

For this reason, when I look back, I see a single thread: the attempt to serve Srila Prabhupada’s mission according to my own sva-dharma.

Yet today I also feel the need to say something more.

The goal has never been the CSB.
The goal has never been the temples.
The goal has never been institutions, projects, conferences, or recognitions.

All these things, when authentic, are merely means.

The goal is spiritual realization.
The goal is purification of the heart.
The goal is to live in Bhakti.

The goal is to allow oneself to be guided, corrected, inspired, and protected by the grace of the Spiritual Master.

The goal is to live, as far as possible, upon the wings of the teachings received from Srila Prabhupada and his mercy.

And if I were to express a hope for the future of our beloved ISKCON, it would be to see more and more devotees united by love for Krishna, by mutual respect, and by the desire to cooperate in the service of our Founder-Acharya, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada.

With this spirit, I would like to conclude by recalling the words that Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu taught us to keep within our hearts:

sarvatma-snapanam param vijayate sri-krsna-sankirtanam

“May the sankirtana of Sri Krishna triumph supremely, purifying and blessing the whole of existence.”

With gratitude, I offer my obeisances to all of you, my precious companions on this journey, and I humbly beg forgiveness if, over the years, even unintentionally, I have failed to show proper respect to anyone.

Hare Krishna.

Your servant, in the service of Srila Prabhupada,

Matsya Avatar Das

Bibliographical Note. The reflections shared here have been offered primarily on the basis of personal recollection and the lasting impression that meeting left upon my life. Some references to the events and circumstances of those days are also documentated in the diary notes kept by Shrila Prabhupada's personal assistant, Hari-Sauri Dasa, published in A Transcendental Diary (Vol. 4, August–October 1976), which is now accessible through the archive PrabhupadaVani.

A Testimony by Manupatni Mataji

My spiritual life began thanks to two very dear people: my Spiritual Master, His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupada, and my husband.

It was August 1976. Matsya Avatara Prabhu, who would become my husband a few months later, was about to fulfill a long-cherished dream: to return to India. He had already traveled extensively throughout Europe, America, and Asia. It was evident that he was searching for something profound, for answers he had not yet found. He felt that India might offer what his heart was seeking.

Shortly before his departure, a mutual friend gave him a book, telling him that it might be useful during his journey. Busy with his final preparations, Matsya Avatara entrusted it to me, asking me to read it while he was away. I absentmindedly put it in my bag and completely forgot about it.

At that time, I loved spending time in a special place: a meadow in front of a small church nestled in the woods, within an ancient sixteenth-century complex. It was a corner of peace and silence where I would go to read, reflect, and regain serenity. I attended the local church, sang in the choir, and felt essentially content with my life.

Yet today, looking back on those years with greater maturity, I realize that there was also a silent search deep inside me. I was not looking for something different from my faith, but I longed to understand more deeply the meaning of life and my relationship with God.

Toward the end of August, on the 27th or 28th of the month, I returned to that beloved place. While searching for something in my bag, I came across the book I had completely forgotten.

I picked it up and began to read.

From that moment, I could not put it down. I read page after page until I reached the very end. When I closed the book, a thought arose spontaneously within me: “I have never read prayers so beautiful.”

I turned the volume over and looked at the author's name: A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada. There was also his photograph and the title of the book: Sri Isopanishad.

Almost at the same time, on the other side of the world, Marco was concluding his journey through India. After visiting Vrindavana, he was blessed with the immense good fortune of meeting in Delhi the very Spiritual Master whose book I was reading.

Looking back on those events today, I still feel how extraordinary they were. We came to know our beloved Spiritual Master in different and apparently distant ways, yet they were perfectly intertwined. I have always perceived all of this as part of a profoundly divine design.

When Matsyavatara returned, he immediately began telling me about what he had encountered: a remarkable person, an authentic Spiritual Master who had given him a glimpse of the purpose of life, the path of love for God, the chanting of the Holy Name, the practice of japa, and the fundamental principles taught by Srila Prabhupada.

I too began chanting the Holy Name on japa-mala and, to my surprise, it all felt natural.

Of course, I was only taking my first steps on the path of Bhakti. I was just nineteen years old. I lived happily with my family and led a simple and peaceful life. I could not imagine where that path would lead me.

I accepted those changes above all because I trusted Marco, the person who is now my husband. A few months later, in May 1977, we received spiritual initiation from His Divine Grace A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Srila Prabhupada, receiving the names Matsya Avatar Das and Manupatni Devi Dasi, and we were married according to the Vaishnava rite.

A deeper understanding of Krishna Consciousness and of the teachings of the Spiritual Master did not come all at once. By the infinite mercy of Srila Prabhupada, it matured gradually, step by step, through the years, through trials, joys, service, and the association of devotees.

And in truth, that process continues even today.

Looking back, I feel profound gratitude.

What began with a forgotten book in a handbag turned into the most precious gift of my life: meeting Srila Prabhupada and discovering the path of Krishna Consciousness.

After so many years, I can say that it was not only Matsya Avatara Prabhu’s journey to India.

It was also the beginning of my own journey — a journey that continues to this very day, by the mercy of the Spiritual Master and Krishna.

On the occasion of the celebration of ISKCON's sixtieth anniversary, which is taking place here at Villa Vrindavana, I would like to share a few memories that are especially dear to my heart.

If the story of my encounter with Krishna Consciousness represents the beginning of my spiritual journey, Villa Vrindavana represents the place where that journey found a tangible dimension of service.

For my family and me, witnessing the birth and growth of Villa Vrindavana has been an extraordinary privilege. We experienced the early years of this project firsthand, sharing its challenges, sacrifices, enthusiasm, and hopes. Looking back on those moments today means remembering a very significant period of our lives, marked by simplicity, cooperation, and deep faith, which helped shape who we have become.

I remember the first time I arrived at Villa Vrindavana. Radharani was two years old, and Keshava was still just a few months old. It was winter, and the weather was very cold. The villa had remained closed for years, and that evening we spent the night there.

With us was also Harideva's mother, who had come to visit her son. She was a practical and resourceful woman, capable of finding a solution to every difficulty. Some rooms still contained the old terracotta stoves. She helped me choose the smallest room so that it could be heated more easily. Then she went into the woods to gather firewood and dry branches, lit the stove, and in no time the room became warm. We slept on the floor in our sleeping bags, but I remember that night with great serenity.

The following morning, I saw Sundararupa Prabhu and Matsya Avatara Prabhu standing on the terrace overlooking the garden from the Red Hall. I listened as they spoke about their plans and dreams for that magnificent property. At that moment, I could not imagine how greatly those plans would transform that place in the years to come.

Soon afterward, my father-in-law, Caitanya Nitay Prabhu, began the restoration work. The task at hand was immense. The first projects involved building bathhrooms and showers. Until then, we had been washing in our rooms using large plastic tubs. We would fetch water in jugs from a spring in the woods and then heat it on the stove before using it.

The first temple was established on the upper floor of the villa, in the room that would later become Sundararupa Prabhu's office. Later, the small church on the property was also restored. For some time it housed the Deities of Sri Sri Gaura-Nitai, who are now worshiped at Prabhupada Desh, as well as the temple activities. Subsequently, through the dedication and vision of Caitanya Nitay Prabhu, one of the old lemon houses was transformed into the current temple — a magnificent structure that still welcomes devotees and visitors today.

As time went on, everything gradually began to take shape. The water supply, the kitchen, the ashrams, and the dining hall were built. The first gurukula, established by Lalita Govinda with great sacrifice, began in a room within the women's ashram, with a small adjoining bathroom.

A laundry area was also set up, with a long row of white washbasins. We used it on alternate days with the Prabhus, but it was not merely a workplace. It was also a meeting place where mothers gathered, conversed, and shared moments of friendship and joy.

When the Deities were installed, my mother-in-law, Ananda Vrindavana Mataji, personally began sewing Their garments. I fondly remember the dedication and care she put into that service.

In those years, all the heating systems ran on wood, made available by the dozens of hectares of forest surrounding the property. The temple’s central heating system was fueled by olive pomace, a byproduct of the over two thousand olive trees on the estate. Even the kitchen ran exclusively on wood. It was not always easy to light it and keep it going, but that system made the community extremely self-reliant and self-sufficient.

Looking back, I realize how much those experiences contributed to shaping our character and our spiritual lives. The sacrifices, the difficulties, and the service we shared made us stronger, more determined, and more united in our intent to serve Guru and Krishna.

I consider myself very fortunate to have lived through those years and to have witnessed the birth of Villa Vrindavana. Keeping these memories in my heart is a great blessing for me, because they represent an important part of my spiritual journey and of my family's history.

Your servant,

Manupatni Devi Dasi